In the Garden of Eden, when God created Adam, He breathed the Holy Spirit into Him. God did the same for Eve. Until they turned away from God, their marriage was Spirit-filled. Through the assistance of the Holy Spirit, we’re able to fulfill our roles as husbands and wives.
After Adam was created, God saw that it wasn’t good for the man to be alone, so He created Eve to supply what he was lacking. Eve completed Him. In Genesis 2:18, God says, “I will make him a helper comparable to him.”
The Hebrew word we translate “helper” is [ezer]. It means, “One who supplies what is lacking.” Elsewhere in the Bible, the Holy Spirit is also described that way—as a helper. God gives Eve the same name He gives the Holy Spirit.
Men and women are completely equal, but we are different. That’s how God designed it. I don’t need another Jimmy in my marriage. I need Karen, because she supplies what I’m lacking. She completes me.
I’ve seen far too many men and women reject the ways a spouse is different from them instead of celebrating those differences. God uses those differences to build successful marriages.
It’s fascinating to me that the role of a wife in a marriage is very similar to the role of the Holy Spirit in the life of the believer. Here are five roles women play in marriage.
Companion:
The Holy Spirit is our eternal helper and a wife is her husband’s best friend. A marriage is at its best when husband and wife enjoy each other and have fun together.
Comforter:
Just like the Holy Spirit was sent as our Comforter, women are anointed to be comforters. To a child or to her husband, a woman’s touch is the most comforting thing on earth.
Counselor:
John 14:17 identifies the Holy Spirit as the “Spirit of Truth.” Women are also gifted with wisdom and intuition. When I make decisions by myself, I tend to make bad decisions. But when Karen and I make a decision together, we never make a bad decision.
Convicter:
The Holy Spirit comes into our lives and specifically tells us things we need to change. Likewise, men are safer and better with a woman next to them. A 48-year-old married man has a 90 percent chance of reaching the age of 65. But a 48-year-old single man only has a 60 percent chance of making 65.
Connector:
Part of the role of the Holy Spirit is to connect us to Jesus and to God the Father. Likewise, women are natural connectors. They connect men to themselves and to the children. They especially keep men connected to their own emotions and to the family.
I hope one thing is clear: When a woman is being a good wife, she is acting like the Holy Spirit.
Husbands, your wife is going to bring significant personality differences to your marriage. Don’t reject or belittle these differences. Embrace them. Your wife completes you, and God uses those differences to help you.