Photo Caption: Happy soldier and his wife sitting on sofa at home. Young soldier hugging wife.

How does God operate?  He operates by faith, with sacrificial love, in peace, and humility, with grace and mercy, gentleness, kindness, patience and JOY.

There is an adage, “The best defense is a good offense.”  This adage has been applied to many fields of endeavor, including games and military combat.  It is also known as the strategic offensive principle of war. Generally, the idea is that proactivity (a strong offensive action) instead of a passive attitude will preoccupy the opposition and ultimately hinder its ability to mount an opposing counterattack, leading to a strategic advantage.


Ammunition is a material used for attacking or defending a position.  The purpose of ammunition is to project a force on a selected target and have an effect.  Its effectiveness depends on the conditions upon which it is stored.

How we use “A.M.M.O” in our marriage is equally as important. When we fail to plan we plan to fail.  We have the opportunity to weaponize ourselves everyday so that we can maintain strategic advantage and live in success.


A Armor:  We can control how we arm ourselves and our marriage everyday. When we put on the whole armor of God, (according to Ephesians 6:10-18) we will be able to stand against the wiles of the enemy. We can stand girded with truth, press our shoulders back with the breastplate of righteousness, plant our feet firmly with the spikes that come from the gospel shoes of peace, and use that shield of faith to protect our bodies from the fiery darts of the wicked one.  Then we take that helmet of salvation, and the sword of the spirit which is the word of God and pierce every lie that comes against our marriage. We take the truth of God’s word and pray that word into our lives, igniting  not only offensive but defensive weapons that can forever impact the trajectory of our relationships.


So often we think we have to “do” something when what we really need to “do” is fast, pray, and arm ourselves and our spouses.  We have to let God do, change, heal, vindicate, work on our spouse, child, or circumstance.  I have realized that we are not the source.  He IS!!! We are the RESource that He may choose to use, however He is the one and true source.  He can “do” in one moment what takes us a lifetime to achieve.


M Mindset: We can control the established set of attitudes we hold.  Oftentimes people’s attitudes are determined by circumstance, or emotions.  Emotions are like the tides.  They are fickle. They come in and go out.   They are in constant change.  We cannot base our attitude or make decisions on emotions. If we are to have a marriage that is peaceful and blessed we must change the way we set our minds.  Yes, our mindset is how we decide to set our minds.  We must set our minds on things that are not movable. Truths that don’t change.  God created us in His image.  Therefore if we are created in His image, we must operate like Him. How does God operate?  He operates by faith, with sacrificial love, in peace, and humility, with grace and mercy, gentleness, kindness, patience and JOY.  God’s mindset, His attitude does not change when circumstances change.  He remains steadfast and secure knowing that everything will workout for good.  He does not lash out at His bride or His children, He turns that energy towards the enemy and fiercely defends His marriage and family. He lives in balance, and order.


M Mouth: James 3:4 NKJV “Look also at ships: although they are so large and are driven by fierce winds, they are turned by a very small rudder wherever the pilot desires.” Our mouths are the same way. Our tongue steers the course of our lives.  Our mouth creates. It creates sound.  That sound is energy made by vibrations. These vibrations create waves which move through various mediums such as air, water, wood, etc. When an object vibrates, it causes movement, called sound waves and keeps going until that wave creates or runs out of energy.


God spoke the world into existence.  He used His word, to create a sound, energy, so powerful that made vibrations so unimaginable, that created waves so massive to move through mediums of air, water, wood, rock, firmament, and create life.  Then using His very breath and hands created us in His image, something so personal, delicate, intricate and intentional, all so we could operate like Him.  He designed us to use our words, to operate like Him! We have the power in our words to create a masterpiece in our marriage.  We can create a spouse who is a sculpture of beauty both inside and out.  We can create children to stand as tall and who are as rooted as oak trees, if only we would speak life into them. We have the power to choose how we use our words and create the life we desire to have.

O Opposition: Opposition comes in many forms and sizes.  Sometimes opposition can come at you from left field, and other times you can see it coming. I love political dramas and one thing they often do is “oppo” research.  “Oppo” research is a practice of collecting information on an opponent or adversary that can be used to discredit or weaken them. We know according to Ephesians 6 that we are not fighting against flesh and blood but against rulers, authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. In our marriage, when circumstances arise whether foreseen or unseen, we are not fighting our spouse, we are warring against that circumstance.

We have fought many battles in our marriage, some that almost took us out, but one thing I realized was Matt was not my enemy.  At no time was I fighting him.  It was always the circumstance that I was against.  That is what drove me to fast, pray, arm myself and stand in the gap for our marriage.  My mind was set that divorce was not an option for me.  I did not see that in my vows, it was til death, not divorce, therefore, there had to be another way, and I was not going to stop stomping the ground.  I could not control my opposition and my opposition was fierce, BUT I could control my Armor, Mindset, and my Mouth.  It did not happen overnight, but God eventually did move in a miraculous way in my marriage, He breathed life back into our dead marriage and for that I am eternally grateful.

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