How to Fix a Lazy Spouse


Video Caption: In this video, Dave and Ashley Willis share how to fix a lazy spouse. One of the most frustrating challenges in a marriage happens when one spouse is doing the majority of the work and the other spouse seems content to be “lazy.”

Video Transcript:

That’s certainly a lonely and frustrating situation, here are a few ways you may be able to help the situation… #1 | COMMUNICATE your frustrations but DON’T NAG. It’s natural to want to talk with sarcasm, nagging, and criticism when your husband or wife doesn’t seem to be “getting it,”. Negative approaches rarely have any positive impact. Instead, look for ways to communicate with more care and less criticism. Most people respond better to positive affirmation than negativity. *Communication will help you determine the root cause of the laziness. If they are truly just being lazy, then address it and encourage him/her to snap out of it. Oftentimes, “laziness” is actually a symptom of a deeper issue like Depression or perhaps a medical condition. #2 | Find SOMETHING to praise. Rewarded behavior is usually repeated behavior. Find something your spouse is doing well and point it out often. Encourage that behavior. Your encouragement could help your spouse create more productive habits. #3 | Offer to do the work TOGETHER. Instead of just assigning him/her chores, find projects you can do together. If your spouse is lazy when it comes to exercise or physical health, instead of just dropping hints they should get off the couch, plan physical activities that you can do together. The shared experience could create some healthier habits for you both. #4| Maintain high standards. There’s a temptation to give in and lower your own standards by thinking, “If he/she doesn’t care, why should I?” You might do everything on this list and your spouse might choose to remain lazy. You can’t control your spouse’s decisions, but you remain in complete control of your own, so choose to maintain a healthy and hardworking standard in the home and all aspects of YOUR life. You’ll feel better, and your positive example may eventually inspire healthier behaviors in your spouse. RECAP COMMUNICATE your frustrations but DON’T NAG. Find SOMETHING to praise. Offer to do the work TOGETHER. Maintain high standards.

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