Loving With Your Whole Heart


Jimmy Evans
Video Caption: In this clip from XO 2021 Houston, Jimmy Evans challenges us in his message "Loving With Your Whole Heart" to making the decision to not let circumstances we face dictate the happiness in our marriage.

Video Transcript:

a marriage without fun is a business relationship and marriage is not a good business relationship you fell in love because you had fun together and you worked at having fun together but kids can come along and work can come along and bills can come along and things can come along and all of a sudden you find yourself you’re just not having fun anymore and that’s a very dangerous time this is research it’s called alone together marriage in america is changing this is a difference between 1980 and 2000 so this is pretty dated in 1980 53 of couples visited friends regularly in the year 2000 only 34 did in 1980 62 of couples went out for leisure activities regularly and by the year 2000 that dropped to 44 uh in the year 1980 78 of couples ate their main meal together in 2066 percent now all of that has dropped all of that has dropped and we’re seeing more of that happening right now and the reason i’m saying that is because we just simply have to understand how important it is that we have fun together and most of the fun that we have together is by ourselves but we also need to have friends that we can have fun with no place better to make friends than in church but what women need to understand is first of all men are more likely to say their wife is their best friend one of the most important needs for men is our wife is our buddy we we want our wife to be our friend and not our mother we want to have fun with you uh they want their wife to share an activity with them that they like men want women there there was a pastor in houston that told the story of a couple whose marriage was healed because she went deer hunting with him and she didn’t hunt their marriage was strained and so she heard that he was going hunting and she said honey i want to go hunting with you and he was a little concerned because he was afraid he wanted to get him alone with the firearm and but she went into his world and went hunting with him and it healed their marriage and so men open up when we’re having fun we’re men are emotionally modest we’re we’re physically immodest but we’re emotionally modest and we don’t open up until we’re around friends if we don’t thank you you’re our friend we have a hard time opening up so women women need to understand the more you invest in friendship with your husband the more you opens up well women they want conversation and meaningful and by the way men consider just about anything to be a date you jump jump in the pickup go to 7-eleven get a slurpee that’s a date okay women want conversation and meaningful interaction and they don’t consider it a date unless there’s significant planning and effort

and so so what i’m saying is women need to understand men are pretty easy to please when it comes to you know but being our buddy but women are not and that’s great because that means she wants you to go to a lot of effort uh to make sure that you know that you’re having fun and stuff like that this fun is not a luxury it’s an essential in the relationship and i’m gonna go back to the heart you make the decision every day whether you’re going to be happy or not

it sure it’s not it’s not based on circumstances a happy person is not a person in a certain set of circumstances a happy person is a person with a certain set of attitudes happiness cannot be bought it cannot be consumed it cannot be worn it cannot be traveled to it’s the spiritual experience of living every day with hope grace and gratitude.

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